R U OK, Blue Trees and the Conversations That Matter
- Tamar Balkin
- Sep 9
- 4 min read
“It wasn’t until I heard her story that I understood her behaviour. She kept leaving the open office to take phone calls, and she never attended social events. I thought she was rude, a snob, or perhaps shy. I had no idea she was struggling with the profound anxiety, grief, and physical distress that comes with failing IVF and associated fertility issues." Coaching client
Last year, I had the pleasure of a long, beautiful road trip up the WA coast from Perth to Exmouth. We swam with dolphins, sea lions, manta rays, and turtles, and the water was the most magnificent shade of blue I’ve ever seen. Along the way, we noticed something unusual: blue trees. We paused by the side of the road and took photos. My curiosity led me to discover the Blue Tree Project, an initiative that began in 2019 after the tragic loss of Jayden Whyte, a much-loved son, brother, and friend, to suicide. As we continued on our drive, these painted blue trees sparked countless conversations about mental health, stigma, and support.
Why Do I Write About R U OK Day Every Year?
Every year, around R U OK Day, I feel a responsibility to write a blog. And every year, I feel sad that the stigma, discomfort, and ignorance around mental illness still prevail. This year, I decided to direct you to sources of support and to consider how you would remind yourself of the importance of talking about mental health.
Sources of Information:
The R U OK organisation continues to produce valuable material on its website. https://www.ruok.org.au/
Rather than repeat the messages, here are links to my past R U OK day blogs:
How to actually talk about mental health in life and work. If you only have time to read one blog, this one has a step-by-step outline of how to have an R U OK conversation.
The power of connection: research shows 72% of people feel better about themselves and their situation after talking to someone about their concerns.
Mental illness hiding in plain sight. How some people appear highly successful while experiencing deep struggles.
As portrayed in the video above, you don't need to be an expert to have an R U OK conversation.
Nala at work
This week, Nala will be volunteering through Delta Therapy Dogs. She’ll be visiting a corporate office, where her calm and gentle nature provides a much-needed pause in the day. In high-pressure environments, time with Nala helps reduce stress, boost morale, and create space for people to breathe. Sometimes, the simplest moments of connection can make the biggest difference.
Practising the Conversation
If you want to practice a conversation, debrief after a meeting, or brainstorm an ongoing concern, just click here and book a time for a free chat. If you would like Nala to join in and it's practical, please let me know. My clients often tell me how valuable it is to have a conversation space with an independent professional, with expertise in the complexities of human behaviour in the workplace.
What are your daily responsibilities?
Creating environments in life and work where people can flourish.
Notice a change in someone's behaviour and encourage them to get help.
Notice your own emotional state, and seek support when needed.
Australian Sources of Help
In an emergency: Call 000
Mental Health Crisis Team: 1800 011 511 (24 hours)
Your GP: They play an important role in coordinating care
Clinical Psychologists and other mental health professionals
A Visual Reminder
Regular readers will know how powerful a visual prompt can be in supporting long-term behaviour change. For some, the Blue Trees are symbols that invite us to notice, to listen, to ask, and to give and receive mental health support.
Click here to email me and share what visual prompt will remind you to pause, notice, and ask: R U OK?
What about my client?
As the session ended, my client reflected:
“I read your blogs, I explore my self-awareness in coaching, and as we discussed today, it is my responsibility to reach out to make the effort to connect. To be supportive and respectful. There’s a delicate balance between knowing enough to help and protecting someone’s privacy. Ultimately, I have realised that it is all about relationships and personal connection”
As always, please email me if you or anyone in your network would benefit from coaching.
If you want to lock in a time for a catch-up up please head to my CalendarBridge by clicking here: https://www.calendarbridge.com/book/jotPVTT
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Please click here to read my past blogs.
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